Some cars feel better parked than driven, and that's not always a criticism
Porter has taken to writing about cars while actually inside said cars
There are lots of things we look for in cars, from grip to slip to steering feel. But there’s something else about a car I like to assess and it’s this: what’s it like to work in? I don’t mean that slightly annoying thing racing drivers do on social media where they post a picture from the cockpit of an F1 car and caption it ‘today’s office’. I mean literally treating a car interior like an office. Just without the plastic plants and a lady called Sue who works on reception and is always trying to tell you unsolicited stories about her husband’s colitis.
I started this hard-hitting analysis because I work at home a lot, I sometimes have to review new cars, and I like to set aside some time to take each one on a proper drive along some nice roads. There was a time when, having had a decent blast across the countryside, I liked to pull over in some spot miles from home to jot down a few thoughts on my phone. And, from this, the next logical step was to take my laptop with me, so that I might be able to bash out a first draft of my car review while parked in a lay‑by. Careful choice of lay‑by is important, of course. It’s hard to write an insightful paragraph on the ride/handling compromise of the Kia Sorento when a local dogger is tapping on the window. Find yourself a remote rural vista, however, and you’ve got a lovely view to gaze at between bouts of work in what I like to call the Carffice.
> £3m donuts, police joyrides and a Ferrari Enzo (almost) in a ditch
The only problem with a Carffice is deciding where to sit. The driver’s seat isn’t ideal because the steering wheel occupies the space where your laptop screen wants to recline. You can move the seat backwards, but in many cars it doesn’t go far enough and if you’re in something without memory seats you’ve just lost the driving position it took you 45 minutes to get right.
The front passenger seat is a better option. No wheel in the way, seat can go right back if you so choose, you’ve still got full access to all the front-seat things you might need, like a decent cupholder and the bag of Percy Pigs you left in the central bin. But don’t discount the back seat either. Obviously if anyone sees you pulling up, getting out and clambering into the back of your own car they might think you’re strange. But on the plus side, the back seat affords a greater sense of privacy. In fact, a plain-clothes police officer once told me that it’s pretty standard practice in his line of work to get into the back seat for a long stint of surveillance. Someone sitting for ages in the front of a parked car looks suspicious. No one notices you in the back. For extra legroom you can slide the passenger seat right forward too.
But not all cars are equal when it comes to back-seat comfort, especially in a Carffice role. In some the seat cushion is too low, forcing the leggier person into an uncomfortable Z shape at odds with trying to balance a MacBook on your lap. In some cars it’s the backrest angle that’s all wrong. Plenty of cars are just too cramped and stuffy back there. In recent times I’ve tried Carfficing from a Peugeot 408 (a bit dark and airless for a prolonged writing session), a Lexus RZ 450e (spacious back seat, would like slightly bigger windows) and a BMW M2 (back seat too cramped, optional M Carbon front seats too bony).
Then I discovered the latest Volkswagen Multivan. You might have seen this one. It looks like the fugly brother of the Bulli-inspired ID Buzz but is based on VW’s mix ‘n’ match MQB platform, so it’s a sort of very stretched Golf. That said, there’s still something quite van-ish in the thuddy-ness of the ride, though I’m sure if you filled all seven seats it would calm down. Otherwise, it cruises well, steers cleanly and can be whipped down a windy back-road with a fluency that will surprise and/or nauseate your passengers.
For sheer utility, the Multivan is superb because it’s a large box with sliding doors and a modular interior that can swallow kids, dogs, bikes and bags in varying proportions. And as a Carffice location, it’s simply superb. When you park up you can walk through from the front to the back, where you’ll find a comfortable sliding seat and a moveable centre console from which you can extend a table. It’s got big windows for a nice view or, if it’s pleasant weather, you can open those huge sliding doors to feel the breeze as you work. I want one purely for its Carffice talents. And also because it would be dead handy for taking things to the tip.
I appreciate this isn’t entirely evo subject matter, not when we should be worrying about grip and slip and steering feel, but there’s been a lot of talk about working from home recently and, let me tell you, we need to talk more about the delights of working from cars.
This story was first featured in evo issue 316.
